In the Pisser

I was going to post this last night. But as I was sitting there on the couch innocently tippie typing away, Jen, who was on the couch doing the same, randomly blurted out:

"I sprinted with my butt today"

And its a little hard to type after you snortle wine up your nose, so I am a day late with this.

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Sometimes a workout, just doesn't work out.

Yesterday's workout called for 1 minute intervals. I like these. I like them because they look funny on the Garmin graphing thingie.

The day was gorgeous. All sunshine, green grass and butterflies. I dawdled quite a bit on my warm up, even stopping to check out some goats that were running around and playing.

I may have dawdled too much and soon felt the urge to pee. I tried to ignore it, but the road was bumpy. I began to look around for a place to go, but I was in an area of nicely fenced off rural homes and very few trees.

I decided to try my intervals anyway. If nothing else it might take my mind of the urge and it might get me to the porta potty by the reservoir faster.

I set off and pedaled...but it just wasn't working. Neither my legs nor my heart would cooperate. My bladder was asserting its authority. Loudly.

Now my workout goal was reduced to "Get to the porta potty!" And then the legs kicked in. And I pedaled as quick as I could, to the big blue box in the distance. As I got closer, the urge grew stronger.

I zipped into the parking lot and pulled up in front of the porta, only to discover that the door was broken off. Ack! And about five cars (some with people in them) in the little parking lot in full view.

I really really had to go. I peeked into the porta and found that aside from the broken door, everything was in good shape. It was clean and full of TP. I stepped inside and sort of wrangled the door so that it leaned against the opening. This was tough to do, because a lean too much on one side, meant that the car people could see in on the other side and vice versa.

After a little bit of futzing around, I finally got it just right.

And awwwwww.....finally, relief was mine.

Happy that emergency was over with, I sort of hopped up a little too briskly to reach for the t.p. And just as I was standing there, halfway levitating over the bowl and halfway reaching for paper, with my lycra down below my knees, the damn door crashed down onto the ground with a big thud.

Door on ground, I had a lovely toilet side view of the lake and all the cars.

I have no idea if the car people saw me. I just scrambled on getting myself covered up and out of there. As quick as I could.

But not before taking a picture. of course.

And I cancelled my intervals.