When your eyeballs hurt

My eyeballs hurt, my stomach is sore and when I shake my money maker instead of the usual cha cha cha sounds, it makes oucha oucha sounds. Not good. These are all symptoms of Event Hangover. Our SurfCity VeloBella Cross event was a mixture of chicki kicki bootie and dickie kicki cutie. My favorite was the UCI official's speech. He actually told us the Swiss would be very happy. Huh? Did I miss a secret Swiss TV network camera or something? Why would the Swiss be happy? Are they all watching us on some reality show called "Event Survivor" because if I missed that and I am still in the running I want to talk to the cameras!! I want to show them my dashboard hula. I know I can win this. All I could think of was some beautiful blonde family cocking their heads watching us on their satylight TV thinking I hope the redhaired hula girl wins. What if they missed the kooky mexican? Maybe I can try out for the event apprentice. The official even gave us tips for our pits, hey should we take tips for pits? At least we shaved ours. So what if the Pit Crew had to cross course to take bikes in and out of the area. No one got hurt and the hula girls danced them to a safe crossing. We sacrificed to the event gods and came out with a beautifully run event. I think the official really just wanted to kiss us.

Why do officials wear golf clothes to mountain bike events?

What is the remedy for event hangover? a boring week at work...but wait I don't work this week ha ha ha I am making my own event everyday...the addiction begins.