Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Highway to hell


That little internet test thingie said I was only 32% evil. If thats the case then I suppose some days I am 0% and others I am full bore 100% eee-vyl.

I was getting gas this morning at a little country market on the corner of Highway 152 and some farm road in Watsonville. Highway 152 is closed this week for repair work and while its a hefty annoyance in my commute, its really no big deal to take one of the other routes to Morgan Hill.

Anyway, as I am getting gas, these two ladies in an Acura (or something) pull up. They are all flustered. The driver screams out of the car at me "I have to get to Highway 5! I have to get to Highway 5!"

"okay" I answer

"they closed 152, what are we supposed to do? We've been driving around these fields all morning"

"okay, you jus-"

"don't they understand that people have to get to highway 5? How are people supposed to get to highway 5??" (as if this part of the world exists soley for people to get to highway 5)

"Would you like me to tell you how to get to highway 5?"

"Yes, I have to get to highway 5!!!"

"Okay, you just follow this road on the left (I think I actually pointed instead of saying left) until you get to Highway 129. Go east on HIghway 129 and it will take you directly to Highway 101, where you will go north-"

"HIghway 101????!!!!! BUT I HAVE TO GET TO HIGHWAY 5!!!!!"

She screamed this at me. As if I were the reason that she was stuck driving around in fields this morning. (Which by the way seems far more preferable to me than driving on Highway 5, but who am I to judge?)

I explained that there was an exit from 101 to 152. By now I was done filling my tank and I offered to them that they follow me as I was going in the same direction except I would not be taking the exit to 152 East.

She breathed a sigh of relief as she was finally getting the service she was entitled to as a CaliForME driver.



We headed down the (very lovely if I dont say so myself) farm roads to 129. And she began tailgating me. You have got to be kidding me. It only happened intermittently and when I looked in the rear view mirror I noticed she was on the phone and not paying attention that she was coming so close to me.

Tailgating. Is there anything more annoying?

We come up on the turn to Highway 129. 129 is a busy little two lane road and making a left there can be tricky. An opening large enough for me, but not for my lost tailgater presented it self. It would be a long wait for the next opening.

......

I made the left.

11 Comments:

At 12:22 PM, June 20, 2006, Blogger X Bunny said...

and the zoolander pic is just the perfect punctuation at the end of this post

 
At 12:31 PM, June 20, 2006, Blogger bbElf (a.k.a. panda) said...

If you are 32% evil then I am a complete psychopath. I would have sent her straight to the middle of booniesville after her first freak out.

I so admire your patience...

 
At 1:27 PM, June 20, 2006, Blogger ginmtb said...

Two words: suh weet!

Oh sometimes it's just so good to be so baaaad!!!

 
At 1:40 PM, June 20, 2006, Blogger PAB said...

i'm sorry, but trying to preserve one's own sanity is hardly an evil act...

i'm with bbelf--you should have told her about the mt madonna rd. shortcut.

on second thought, cyclists use that road. you handled it just right.

 
At 2:04 PM, June 20, 2006, Blogger Olaf Vanderhoot said...

naughty bella

 
At 3:08 PM, June 20, 2006, Blogger the old bag said...

Xcellent post!

 
At 4:36 PM, June 20, 2006, Blogger Erein said...

heh. you made me snort my gatorade.

 
At 6:19 PM, June 20, 2006, Blogger Miss Mary said...

I'm with bbelf

you should have sent her up highway one or something

but nice patience there sister...

 
At 8:15 PM, June 20, 2006, Blogger Velo Bella said...

am patient to a fault
sometimes I'd really prefer not to be
but thankfully my honey and some of my closest friends swing towards the inpatient side.

But don't tell them I said that.

 
At 8:16 PM, June 20, 2006, Blogger Velo Bella said...

and I should have had her non-driving skillz ass follow me up Mt Madonna and down Redwood Retreat

How do you like those boonies?

 
At 11:52 AM, June 21, 2006, Blogger L. Christmas said...

hillarious!!

 

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